jegyzetek..."cenzurazatlanul" az olasz ut alatt szuletett naplobol

Workshop 1 – integrated
Workshop 2 – Dark Side

April Prog: show
22+ 1 (me)
voices/sounds
how different can one be
to bring down the walls

- express self
- create emotions
- political ---- in every day life

realize the boundaries and the every day life and bring down the walls
- how else if it’s not working

Italo Calvino

___________________________________________

Sono qui. Non posso parlare es megis. Ahhogy megyek bele a napba, egyre tobbet, egyre batrabban merek beszelni. Remelem, hogy ez a tiz nap vegere csak jobb lesz.

Persze ok meg valahol az angolomat akarjak.

Aristide az anyukajaval alkik. Aranyos kis lakasuk van. Itt Imolaban sok..hasonlo haz van. A belvaros gyonyoru, kis utcak, terek.
OLASZOK!!!

Tenyleg odajutottunk, hogy…dajutottam, hogy mar nem erzem kivul/belulallonak magma. VAGYOK.

Most irjak arrol, hogy mi tortent az elmult heten?
Mirol?
Seth levelerol
A Dori-Kati fele mizeriarol
Az Anyaval valo konfliktusrol
.az

Faj. Illetve: zavar.
Eloszor is, ismetelten bennem van & felmerult bennem a kerdes, h mi a baj velem. Ill., h biztos en rontottam el. (Ez Seth-el is volt.)
Az SMS es a beszelgetesek = aztan persze nem is, mert szoban, negyszemkozt….

Es nem kellene nekem ezzel annyit foglalkoznom. Eloszor is, mert nincs ra szuksegem, masodszor, biztos, h nem akarok lenni.
Tetszik. Ill. Izgalmas es igeretes volt az, ami elindult, es en az igeretekre vagytam, no meg a beteljesulesukre.
Izgalmasak az egyuttletek __ aztan persze, mirol beszelek. milyen egyuttletekrol??? nem is vagyunk egyutt? nincs leves, nincs egyutt. nincs. nincs. nincs. nincs.

Remelem, hogy most ez a 10 nap rendbe tesz. Foleg annak tudataban, hogy

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• no direzione / contribuzioni

giusto

differenzie inevitabili

• camminando – neutrale
• movimento / gesto: con un intenzione ----) sviluppare
• dimostrare & rispondere con un altro gesto ---) seconda di base di stesso interpretazione
• fare qualcosa con la sete ma non siedersi

neutrale//intenzione
entrare il palcoscenico

ARTE BENESSERE

NUOVO / SOCIALE
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- describe the character – in chorus / by individuals
- re-enact the circus scene
- Gabor: already in
Or in the restroom!
Spiderwebbed with…alcohol?????
- give something to each ---- to create the we are all the same (all Lelands)
- center positioning (Gabor in the corner, center: has chairs in, Sylvia is in the middle)
- Leland walks in and thru the corridor all throughout; walks in and then in circles, then in and then out, and then repeats it at least 2
- Karaoke?????
- Agi: if corpses!!!!! BUILD IT IN WITH THE CHARACTER
- Gesture repetition

---
- people come in --) circus scene already goes with A and Zs
- G. sits and drinks (ask Durer crew to serve in the beginning); sits down with different groups of people

- Roberta sits in the middle of the center/circle and “builds” her tummy

- Circus: routine, repeated interrupted / imitates by Leonard’s entrances and exits

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Rengteg minden tortenik.

Eloszor is: az olaszom egesz szepen automatizalodik. Barcsak tobbet es jobban mernek beszelni. Amiert Corrado elott nem merek…?

Aristide – nos,

Annyit eszem mar, megint. Persze johetne az elhatarozas, ahogy jon is, h majd torna meg minden. Remelem, h vhogy be/megtartom.

Az elmult het napban ketszer-haromszor is meghivtak – ma fizettem en is. Nem szeretnem, h mindenert ok fizessenek.

Este Corradonak is elmondtam, h jo szellemileg stimulalo kornyezetben lenni – szuletnek a gondolatok, repul az ido, es elvezem ezt az eletstilust, amit kovetunk. Persze, ez meg cask ket nap volt. Es persze, voltak olyan dolgok, amik nem 1000%-osan kotottek le. De ez cask peldaja annak, h hogyan mashogy szeretnem en csinalni….

A tegnap esti beszelgetes szinhazrol, technikarol, jovorol, elfogadasrol….szuper volt.

C.: mit csinalj? A palyan maradni, dolgozni. PRACTICE = LEARN.
YOUR THEORY.

** do workshops. On your own.

Bologna

• ma prima: ieri ---) Halloween
• about Hungary
o in Aprile
straight, industrial

email:

I’m a bit confused because Dr. James sent me an email with a double meaning.
Hopefully he has gotten mine. I do have one.
Tomorrow I have to edit it.

Bologna: direct, straight, square
Imola sokkal baratsagosabb

Rehearsal:
hat, az biztos, h az ilyeneken valo reszvetel ramutat arra, h en hogy mashogy csinalnam
A szoveg es az otletek szuperek, de….. nehol nem tiszta es hat a kivitelzese???!!!
Nincs egyertelmu instrukcio, se annak megertese, megertetese, h mi es hogy legyen.

Terra --- flowers
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En / te
Move in spot
Find a way from io to tu
Find a common movement, a dance of the two individuals become one

Cacciattare qualcuno (with anger)

• viaggio
• *Brook: Open Door
• rope / light

not clear in the head about what’s happening

I’m thinking in a different language now.
Different from what?
Is it different at all?

There are things I like. And of course, things I don’t. As all all else.

Per esempio, non mi piace questo testo.

E piu difficile per me adesso a scrivere e pensare in inglese perché ora sono in Itali e spendo molto tempo con gli italiani.
Mi preoccupa nonostante che io non posso parlare fluently.

Letting go – easy advice. Easy to give, easy to take, if you are preoccupied with the very ?it? that should be let go.
Who were the ones I let go? Haha…..

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After I became a prostitute, I had to deal with penises of every imaginable shape and size. Some large, others quite shrivelled and pendulous of testicle. Some blue-veined and reeking of stilton, some mistily. Some crabbed, enchanted, dusted with pearls like the great minarets of the Taj Mahal, jesting penises, ringed as a tail of a racoon, fervent, crested, impossible to live with, marigold-scented. More and more I became grateful I didn’t have to own one of these appendages.

I was like a social worker for lepers. My clients had a chunk of their body they wanted to give away; for a price I was there to receive it. Crimes, sins, nightmares, hunks of hair: it was surprising how may of them had something to dispose of. The more I charged the easier it was for them to breather freely once more.

To kill something that wants to live so desperately is in direct contradiction to any kind of philosophy, religion, belief system that I hold.

Bob was both sadist and masochist to me; for him I was Madonna and whore.

I suppose part of my genetic makeup has given me this love of material objects. Or maybe it’s just a phase I will outgrow as soon as I get everything I want. Even saints have human flaws; it is overcoming their own frailties that makes them greater than the sum of their parts.

I have to be a constant actress, on my guard and yet fitting into every situation. (Always the wedge of moon above, reminding me of my destiny and holy water.)

Anyway, I’m trying to learn how to get along with a man.

________________________________________
Is it easier to be creative when you are depressed?
Non lo so.
Non lo so.
Nem tudom.

…the concept of having many languages to speak but not having my words heard is……is rather mysterious per me.

Confused………..I am confused.

Voglio fare troppe cose.

I had no experience. What’s so

What happened?
Why and how did I let things happen?

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Mi tortenik? Neha nem tudom, miert lesz rosszkedvem?
Most eloszor is resze van benna annak, hogy sok es keves dolog is tortenik egyszerre.

Azert szamolom, szamoltam a napokat.

…zavar a nyelvtelenseg,
…zavar a vegtelenseg,
…zavar a helytelenseg.

…igen, mert olyan…olyan helytelennek erzem magam. Ha: helytelen……nos, az egy kicsit fura szo.

„Come on baby, light my fire.“

Almos vagyok. Most tudnek aludni
Ha becsukom a szemem….

Sok kenyeret eszem. Sok kenyeres dolgot eszem. Nem kellene.

Szemtelen, nem illetlen dolog, hogy most irok, ahelyett, h…..de mi helyett..--- hiszen nem tudok reszt venni a tarsalgasban.

FRAGMENTED.
DISLOCATED.
INSPIRED.
SEEKING.
MISUNDERSTOOD. ---) NOT UNDERSTOOD
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MONICA_TIMISANI@HOTMAIL.COM

That We won’t meet before I leave for Hungary?
Allora
------------------

Today I have written a shitload of stupidity nella mia blog.
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I’m cold. Recently I’m cold many times. This coldness is rarely a physical one.

This sentence is bad.

I have no fears now.
For a long time.

Scattered.
Fragmented.

CAN’T concentrate.

Oszintenek lenni magunkho?
Oly nehez.
Nincs felelem, de feltes?
Hol az ertelem?!

Egyedul vagyok. Es megsem. Az a fajta magany, maganyossag, amit feleve ereztem, mar nincs bennem. Valahol elfogadtam, hogy igy van. Bant, zavar, nem esik jol, de nem…tobbe nem ‘faj”.
Mindannyian egyedul vagyunk? Igen is es nem is. Hajlamosak vagyunk azt hinni, hogy

MOST ALUDHATNEK

MAGABIZTOSABB VAGYOK
ES NEM IS. GAVOR RATAPINTOTT VMIRE, AMIT NEM IS NAGON ERTETTEM, AMIKOR MONDTA, DE
KINEK CSINALOM?
MINEK CSINALOM?

HOL AKAROK LENNI?
MIT AKAROK CSINALNI?
MIT FOGOK CSINALNI?
EGYATALAN FONTOS EZ?



CONFUSION

W ……

MIERT KI SZOL?

CONFUSION
EMPTINESS
LEVITATION
LIGHT
NO FEARS
DIRECTION
SHOCK?
NON-UNDERSTANDING
LAUGHTER
SORRY / REGRET
SADNESS
ANGER
JEALOUSY
HONESTY
FEAR
ACCEPTED FEAR
LONELINESS
EMPTINESS
COMPLETE

SEEKER

I hate and I already lied.

It bugs me to confess that he had right when he described me like that.
A DESPERATE SEEKER
With all the possible
POSITIVE & NEGATIVE
Qualities / meanings of it.

Bugs me that he could see & verbalize it & bugs me that it bugs me
That now , or ever since rather, I get to this conclusion
What is it? How to deal with it?
“deal” with it at all?
ACCEPT! YEAH, actually is accepted but then.

The scholarship is a great opportunity but also a burden
BEC. YOU HAVE TO COME BACK.
Not necessarily to Hungary ---)
but life

GROWING UP. GROW UP.

_ _ _ _ _
I’m drawing lines. Lines that are directed towards something. Interesting to see that my lines don’t contradict each other. Which I do. Do i?
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Wasn’t able to write

Mit erzem, hogy erzem mit erzek
Hol erzem, mit erzek, hogy erzem

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Ma sokat gondoltam New Yorkra.
Es sokat ettem.
Ma sokat gondoltam NYra.
Rajuk. Arra, ami tortent.
Es, ahogy tortent.

Az egyik kinyilas valahol J.vel kezdodott…vagy….nem….nincs vagy.
Egy orult este – ejsaka egy orult pillanata.

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Live Yor Own Life.
Thoughts about art.

Communicating meaning, message

Educating people __art not to descend to the level of people, but people to be educated

_
This moment Imolaban vagyok.
Holnap ilyenkor mar otthon leszek.

Otthon: mokor valik vmi, egy hely otthonna? Mitol valik egy otthonna?

Mikor lett…egyaltalan, a lakast hivom otthonnak vagy cask a hazat vagy azt, hogy anyaval megyek
Vagy inkabb az hatarozza meg az otthont, ami az a hely, ami nem hol most vagyok?

Akkor van identitaszavarom

Hogy lehet ezt az automatikus irast jol alkalmazni, ha egyszer az ember gondolatai cask ugy keletkeznek? Vagy ki kell kapcsolni mindent es cask engedni, hogy irjon?!

Mi fog tortenni holnaputan?
Mi fog tortenni holnaputan?

Lehet ures a fejunk?
Lehet, hogy amikor nem megy a koncentralas….csak…